Street urchins were going through the pockets of the dead thugs as the Barkeep of the Sultry Siren dumped water on the cobblestone streets, washing the blood away down the drain.
He turned around without looking and accidentally put his peg leg through the decapitated head of thug #1.
"Oh, Godsdammit," he said, using his other foot as leverage to kick it off. As he looked up, he saw a city guard approaching and sighed with a groan. "Here we go."
"Seamus," the guard said while stepping over a body.
"Reggie," Seamus responded, leaning against the outer wall of his establishment, secretly pushing a panel that immediately alerted the people inside to start hiding the REALLY illegal things.
"I hate to do this, but I've got these church folk here who want to look into this situation," Reggie said, motioning generally to the bodies in the street.
"Church folk? What fucking church folk?"
Reggie looked back and waved to where he came from. Waiting at the end of the alleyway were a Leonin with several braids in his mane and an Aasimar with chilling white eyes and long blonde hair pulled back over her ears. Both were wearing plate armor and had large shields adorned with the symbol of Helm.
"The Holy fucking Order," Seamus groaned as they approached.
The Leonin tried his best at a smile, but it looked more intimidating than he intended. His booming voice didn’t help.
"The Holy Order of Helm at your service, citizen. We will do what we can to make sure that ruffians will no longer cause harm to your fine establishment..." he paused and looked up to read the name of the bar, but instead met the large image of a topless Siren. "Is that appropriate with all the uh... Children around?"
One of the urchins finished his pipe, dumped the ashes into the mouth of one of the corpses, and laughed to himself.
The Aasimar crouched near some of the bodies, ran a hand over their wounds, then looked over at the door where bullets were now lodged in the building. She turned to Seamus.
"Was the bear one of their pets, or were they a druid?"
"I don't fuckin' know, we don't have 'em fill out a fuckin' survey when they come to drink."
She nodded and looked up at a large clock installed at the top of the inn.
"Your clock isn't functional," she said, standing and seemingly following invisible footprints on the stone streets with her eyes.
"Yeah, the godsdamned [[The Tinkerer]] ghosted me."
She nodded and motioned to the Leonin.
"They went this way, sir."
"Very good," he said, walking next to her and following the path. He looked to Seamus as they walked away. "And maybe think about some sort of bikini top... Or maybe a full turtleneck for your sign there. Something decent, right?"
Seamus and Reggie looked at each other before the guard shrugged and followed them.
Seamus groaned again as he started dragging the bodies into a single pile.
"Fuckin' Paladins..."